Happy 5th rebirth to me!!
I’m fantastic today!! Remarkable to think I’ve been paralyzed twice since this date 5 years ago and none of that matters today. I take my recovery with my Marburgs the same as I take my recovery from alcoholism. My life is simply one day at a time. I thank god everyday for the collection of 25 years of sobriety which in turn gave me the strength to battle a by far more difficult fight, which was the fight for my life with my Malignant form of MS.. I have been “CURED” from my malignancy which I am forever grateful. I continue to fight the damage of my old disease, but this is nothing in comparison of being run over moment to moment by a fast moving train which now doesn’t happen anymore..
My life is what I make it. I’m so grateful for being able to see that good is the enemy of great. I like the rest of us had know idea what my life would to out to be. I can only say today that if I had known I’m uncertain as how I would have faced it. Life is quite spectacular when a person thinks about it.
I mean really thinks about it!!
I know for me when everything was coming at me so fast I had no time, I mean zero time to prepare for what was about to happen. This I do believe is surely what saved me. I look back now thinking if I actually had time “to think” I may not have made it. My God “High power” whatever I wish to call what I believe in, has saved me more times that I can count. My life continues to be laid out before me on day at a time. I would nearly say on moment to moment basis some days.
I would not have taken my life important enough to share with other people on a public stage, it is becoming increasing clear that this is where my life path is leading me. It was when I started to ask what I was to do with my life when things started to settle out, when I was finally willing to see that my career as a long haul truck driver was over. At this point it was plain to see that I was being led in the path of sharing my life.
Today I had one of those moments that shows me where I am to go. I was at the drugstore picking something up. When I had walked through wasting the ten minutes required for my prescription to be ready to go was just enough time for God to do what needed to be done. I walked up to the till and there was a copy of my laying on the edge of the counter. There “happened” to be a lady customer standing at the end of the counter as I walked by. I looked at the teller when I saw my book laying there and asked “hello what’s my book doing up here?” I only asked because I found it ironic that it was up on the counter on the fifth anniversay of my rebirth. The counter lady said “one of the other employees had it out to look at.” I found this neat under the circumstances of the day. I, by now, being me had the attention of the customer that had been standing there all this time. We then started a dialog, lest I say it wasn’t long into this that I was signing the copy that she was going purchase. It was though speaking with her that she shared with me a loss a few years ago of one of relitives that pasts from MS. She and I were rather teary eyed in our short chat of the power of MS. I am always grateful when am able to ease someones grief or at least share in it. The power that one person has with another is a gift given without fear of judgement. It is encounters just like this one that continues to show me what I am to do with my life, the life that was given.